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Christie Sims is an E-book author who devotes most of her craft to writing dinosaur/human erotica. These $2.99 masterpieces are just begging for the Oprah book club treatment, but until that day comes, it’s up to me to spread the good word.

Here’s a picture of Christie Sims from her Amazon author page:

christie

Why doesn’t Stephen King pose like that for his press photos?

I read a few selections from her various books on Distorted View, but today I want to share with you a my favorite covers! (in no particular order) Most are dinosaur-themed, but there are two bonus genres included because I love you so much.

 

1 – In The Velociraptor’s Nest

Velociraptors Nest

[jumbotron background=”#4B1911″ color=”#FFFFFF”]What I love about this cover is that absolutely no consideration has been taken when it comes to proportions. I’m pretty sure they just slapped some stock art together and didn’t bother re-sizing anything. Also, the background looks more like a desert and sand dunes than a velociraptor’s nest. Did dinosaurs roam the desert looking for cave-girl pussy? Also, I’m sure the dinosaur appreciates the necklace and bikini. [/jumbotron]

2 – Mating With The Raptor

Mating With The Raptor

[jumbotron background=”#524234″ color=”#FFFFFF”]What sells me on this book is the way the Raptor is looking at our female protagonist. It’s like he was just running along, about to disembowel his prey when he catches a glimpse of this swimsuit clad vixen, and does a double take. Also, he’s totally leering at her breasts. Even male dinosaurs are PIGS. [/jumbotron]

3 – Ravished By The Triceratops

Ravished By The Triceratops

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Again, the designer is playing loosey-goosey with what we know about dinosaur sizes here.  Despite the fact that this Triceratops looks to be the size of a border collie, one can’t help feel that it would be a shocking sight to see an extinct animal sniffing up upon you. Not for this woman, though! She looks bored, not even making eye contact with the reptilian beast. There isn’t even an ounce of fear in those peepers. She just wants to get this OVER WITH. It’s a look I am sadly used to. [/jumbotron]

4 – Taken By The Pterodactyl

Taken By The Pterodactyl

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Of course I’m not advocating dinosaur-on-woman rape, but come on. She is totally asking for it. That devilish grin, her ass totally on display for the winged-monster, boobs pushed together: it all adds up! The smile on the Pterodactyls mouth says it all.

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5 – Mounted By The Gryphon

Mounted By The Gryphon

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Yes, I know a gryphon is not a dinosaur. But Christie Sims, the author, can’t be pigeon-holed into writing just dino-porn, and neither can I! The girl on the cover is totally going to get banged doggy-style by a gryphon. A GRYPHON! Check out his “O” face!

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6 – Training The Dragon

Training The Dragon

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Not quite dinosaur porn here, but I had to include this in my list. Again the designer was shopping around for stock art and slapped a few piece together like a poorly arranged collage. But! If you squint, it kind of looks like the dragon is touching her breast. Also, the title makes it seem like the girl in the story has to train a virgin dragon in the ways of sex, which is a great premise for a book.

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The author seems to crank out new and exciting books every two weeks or so, so there are plenty more to choose from. Check out her Amazon author page and see some of her other amazing work.